- 13,373
- Posts
- 15
- Years
- Age 30
- Seen Jan 28, 2019
Dear Anonymous,
I'm regretting the scars I left you. I visited you today, and I did cry. It should have been me. That's the only thing that went on in my head. You never did anything bad in your life. I'm regretting ignoring you. I'm regretting not listening you. I'm regretting not being there for you. I wish I could take it all back. I wish I could go back in time. Maybe that would have changed everything. I heard your favorite song today on the radio today, and what memories it brought back. I wish I could go back to those days. When we were best friends. You would have been something great. I would have helped you raised your kid. She was supposed to born a week after your death. It hurts me to think about it. That guy took two lives that days, and I would give anything to bring you back. You wanted to live. I didn't. Life is to short and cruel. I read your journal the other day, I know I said I couldn't but I tried, I only got three pages before breaking down, pathetic isn't it. Some man I am. I went to go return it today, your sister wasn't too pleased with me. I'm thinking that she won't ever forgive me, and I don't blame her. I know it's my fault and now I have to live with that. Your parents say it isn't my fault, but I know they hate me. I don't blame them either. I'm to blame. You just wanted to live. You just wanted me to understand. And I wanted nothing with you. I always ran away when I confronted you. I'm pathetic. I can't tell you how many times I've told myself that. I just want one chance so I could change thing. I wanted to apologize. It feels like there's a thorn stuck in my heart and I can't get it out. They made a memorial to you at school. I just can't face to go there alone. I just can't. I end up crying. Remember how you told me not to cry? How things always get better? How no matter what we still had each other? I wish I still had you. I wish and wish, but nothing happens. I'm angry at myself. I hate myself. I feel too alone. If I could meet you, just for one minute, I would change everything. I'd give my life for it. One of my friends compared me to a bee that lost it's sting, they tell me I'm hollow inside and they tell me it gets better, and I'm waiting for it to get better. But it never will. I wish I could erase my heart. Erase myself from this world. So that you could have never met me. I wish. And that's all I could do....
I'm regretting the scars I left you. I visited you today, and I did cry. It should have been me. That's the only thing that went on in my head. You never did anything bad in your life. I'm regretting ignoring you. I'm regretting not listening you. I'm regretting not being there for you. I wish I could take it all back. I wish I could go back in time. Maybe that would have changed everything. I heard your favorite song today on the radio today, and what memories it brought back. I wish I could go back to those days. When we were best friends. You would have been something great. I would have helped you raised your kid. She was supposed to born a week after your death. It hurts me to think about it. That guy took two lives that days, and I would give anything to bring you back. You wanted to live. I didn't. Life is to short and cruel. I read your journal the other day, I know I said I couldn't but I tried, I only got three pages before breaking down, pathetic isn't it. Some man I am. I went to go return it today, your sister wasn't too pleased with me. I'm thinking that she won't ever forgive me, and I don't blame her. I know it's my fault and now I have to live with that. Your parents say it isn't my fault, but I know they hate me. I don't blame them either. I'm to blame. You just wanted to live. You just wanted me to understand. And I wanted nothing with you. I always ran away when I confronted you. I'm pathetic. I can't tell you how many times I've told myself that. I just want one chance so I could change thing. I wanted to apologize. It feels like there's a thorn stuck in my heart and I can't get it out. They made a memorial to you at school. I just can't face to go there alone. I just can't. I end up crying. Remember how you told me not to cry? How things always get better? How no matter what we still had each other? I wish I still had you. I wish and wish, but nothing happens. I'm angry at myself. I hate myself. I feel too alone. If I could meet you, just for one minute, I would change everything. I'd give my life for it. One of my friends compared me to a bee that lost it's sting, they tell me I'm hollow inside and they tell me it gets better, and I'm waiting for it to get better. But it never will. I wish I could erase my heart. Erase myself from this world. So that you could have never met me. I wish. And that's all I could do....