Fathers

Copying the mothers thread, what is your relationship with your father?

Mine was...never there for me, sort of just ignored my existence.
Even now, I believe he favors my brother.

That said, our relationship isn't bad. I don't hate him and we don't fight or anything.

A huge blur. I remember watching him leave for work in the mornings. Apparently he wanted to hold me all the time, but I don't exactly remember this.

He gave up his health with heavy drinking and extremely unhealthy foods, he passed away from a heart attack. I was in the room, but I didn't understand anything that was happening. I just knew these people had came into the house and had taken him while he was "sleeping". I know I was starting to wonder where he went, I don't remember who explained it.

I still find solace in cemetery visits. It's the closest we can be together.

My dad has his faults, but he was way more involved in my life than my mom. He was there for me when I needed advice and support. He was then whenever I broke something and he'd fix it. He was there whenever I fell off my bicycle or (depending on the season in Florida) when I needed a bowl of ice cream or chicken noodle soup. He was just summoned whenever I needed him so I was lucky. These days we are rather distant (my mom is extremely paranoid about COVID), but he's still a good dad in my book. He's the kind of guy that would give you the shirt off his back if you were cold.

My mom broke up with my dad when I was a baby and I never saw him again. Alot of years past and my dad fount my sister on facebook and got in contact with her and I heard he lives in another country. My sister does not keep in touch with dad anymore.

I have a stepdad and we get along well. There are also times when we argue with each other.

My father and mother died long ago I was adopted and i recently came to know I just started crying and went whole day crying I have a big step brother and i am often discriminated

I've generally had a good relationship to my dad but he has a lot of traits that annoy me

but i look past those simply because we do love each other

My father was the best I could ask for. Yes, we had our arguments, but he only would do that to advice me or make sure, that I didn't make similar mistakes as him.
He was very protective too. When I got suspended from school for defending my sibling, he cheered me on and said
'That's my girl!' while I was upset about the punishment. He always encouraged me to stand up for myself and/or my sibling at school. Even when I got really ill for about two weeks, he was always there to clean up and bring me soup.

I miss him everyday now, as he's no longer here, but I'm happy he taught me a lot, cared and supported. Even when I had brushed conversations off or didn't say a lot. He never questioned it and understood that, I personally cannot help that part.
Always treated me the same as my brother; never forced me to like girly things or boyish things. Encouraged me to do things, even when the teachers or other parents would be like 'that's for boys' etc.

I think our relationship was pretty good now that I think of it and I'm glad that it didn't end on a rough note.

Our relationship is good! I love my dad very much and I appreciate everything he has done for our family

My Dad was super short-tempered when I was younger and I remember getting yelled at a lot for the most random things. I told myself I would never get angry at someone like that and since then have been very calm and level-headed out of a desire never to lash out like that. That being said, I do like and respect my Dad. He has his faults but for what it is worth, he has mellowed out a lot and generally is much calmer these days. He tries to be supportive and even makes dad jokes from time to time so overall he's good now that I've grown up.

I think I might have the best dad ever? He was a huge **** while my parents were still together and the drinking, screaming, and violence didn't help, but that's in the past now. And even in those dreadful times, there were still little moments that I remember that left a massive impact on who I am today.

He celebrated 15 years of sobriety just a few months ago. Still so proud of him. He motivates me, wants what's best for me, and pushes me to be the best me I can be.. even if I struggle with that part now and again, lol. I think most of all, he respects me and I respect him. We went through some shit together and now that the storm passed and we're both adults on a level playing field, we have a great relationship.

Love ya, dad. ♡

Mine has been dead for about ten years. He had a bunch of health issues which also meant he couldn't work, but he still tried to keep things clean at home. Well, as long as he was able to do it. I never really managed to get any sort of emotional bond with him, though. We did fight over the bathroom occasionally, he with his illnesses and I with a weird stress related thing that I had back then.

My father hasn't really been in my life ever since I turned 17. After my parents got divorced and he moved out, he tried to stay in my life by having me spend some time with him on the weekends. Then after a while, he started making up excuses by how he had work or he had to be out of town almost all the time. At one point, I actually lived with him a few months, but then he came up with this huge disgusting lie that he had cancer and basically kicked me out and sent me to go live with my mother. After that, he really hadn't been in my life all that much and I'm now at a point where I honestly don't want to reach out and talked to him because of the many times he basically lied to me and even used me, even going as far as claiming me on his taxes when I haven't lived him since I was 18 and it was at a time I found about using me on his taxes when I had to go file my own taxes for the first time and I had difficulty doing it because he basically was using my social security number and my mom had to call him to get him to stop. And I was 26 at the time.

But anyways, my stepdad has been more in my life than my dad had been in the last 11 years. Sure me and him butt heads from time to time, but in all honesty, I brag about him more than I do with my own father.

And yes, I do have trust issues with my own father, but it's because he's lied to me more times than anyone else, he's broken promises, and he basically had been using me. So, anytime I had anyone ask me about my own father, I just start shutting down. But, I'm more than happy to talk about my stepdad.

I didn't even know my dad until I turned 16. Didn't know his name or what he looked like and never really asked about him, either. My mom had a fling with him and wound up pregnant. He was a drug addict and did heroin and cocaine and probably other shit I don't know about.

When my mom was about 6 months pregnant, she confronted him about child support, how he needed to step up and be a man. He was all cracked out and insane when this happened and tried to cut her belly open with a knife to murder her and me. Obviously, he failed. He hasn't told me about this (might not even remember with how strung out he was), and I found out about this through her.

That said, he's been clean for about two decades now. We've hung out a bit and he's all right; not great, not bad, just somewhere in the middle. I've kept a handwritten letter from him that he'd sent in my teens basically describing how he knows he fucked up and wanted to meet up with me. He came to my wedding and introduced himself as my "no-good deadbeat father" to the people there.

We generally are peaceful and he's pretty eager to beat himself up over mistakes he's made in the past (which are admittedly big and many). But we don't interact much so he's never really on my mind and I don't tend to think about him or our relationship.

I had a step-father at one point and he was an utter douche and emotionally abusive. He would lose his temper on me a lot (I was a young teen with panic disorder, depression, and anxiety, so I was obviously a lot) and call me names ("stop being stupid", "you're a bitch", etc). At one point, we were arguing and he shoved his hand over my mouth to get me to shut up. So I smacked his hand away, and he slapped me in the face. I slapped him back, and he shoved me into the counter, which is when I screamed for my mom. He stood over me saying, "You got something to say, then say it to my face". Real good parenting there. Why not just physically abuse your 14-year-old 115 lb step-daughter as a 6'1" 220 lb man? Seems fair.

I really hated that guy and his sons. They were all assholes and I wish I'd never had the displeasure of knowing them during those 3 years.

Thank god my husband is a sweet guy and is going to make an amazing father. His father was a deadbeat who OD'd 10 years ago, but my husband didn't even care cuz it was so obvious that his father was a loser who didn't love him anyway. Really wish women would choose their dicks more carefully, tbh... But at least I'm breaking the cycle in my family and his (can't say the same for my sister-in-law who is bringing a physically abusive revolving door of dicks around her 3-year-old daughter). Hopefully I can instill good values in our kids so we can stop this insanity.

I had a step father as well, he died recently. He was very sick and suffered ptsd so there were hard times but he was also full of love and sensitivity. I miss him a lot.

My dad is like Homer Simpson..not the beer-hogging, why-you-little type of dad, but the lovable knucklehead you love to have in your life. And I thank him for giving me his leadership traits, because damn, it takes guts to be a leader of something, and I'm so happy that I am not scared of being the first to take action in group work.

My father was an anonymous sperm donor that my moms chose. They liked his medical history and his level of education. According to his record my dad was a therapist who enjoyed sports and rock collecting. He's never reached out to me or my half siblings. I was lucky enough to meet one of them ten years ago, but that's my only connection to my dad. His family, even after finding them, have refused to speak with me.

He's more like a brother to me than a father. Especially since I turned 21 our conversations have mostly boiled down to "when are we gonna hang again" "when you gonna get a girl again" "have you tried x yet?". He always kind of had that sort of vibe with me once I became a teenager since he had hoped I'd get a lot of my stupidity out of the way early on and wanted to help me experience certain things, but in doing that I ended up in the role of his babysitter more often than either of us would like to admit. I don't hate him by any means, but I also don't seek out conversations with him. We both have our own lives to live, and the only time I come back into his really is when he needs me to sober him up.