Answer the question above... TWISTED EDITION!

[StCooler]

One for each eye, one for each ear, one for the tongue and one for the nose.

What do you write in your private diary?

 

[Devalue]

Writes about all the best scams. Disguises them as shopping stories, charitable acts, and good fortune to prevent it ever being used as evidence. Will give you an entry from last year.

December 12, 2021
Dear Diary,

Worked at the animal shelter today. Cleaned out a few cages. Scrubbed one awful one for a while to remove the gamey smell. Must not get many volunteers this time of year. Would not have been so smelly, if so. Stresses the importance of volunteering, though.

Played with all the cute kitties, of course. Really loved the feather this time. Coaxed shy little Cally into accepting some pets too.

Surprised the workers with gifts at the end. Gave them all dongles with a special computer security program. Seemed quite appreciative of the gifts. Hopefully protects them against malicious credit card thieves and other nasty malware. Heard stories about those thieves recently. What kind of terrible person would do that?

Slipped the shelter an anonymous donation as well. Totaled $121,450. Ought to make a huge difference around there. Feels so good to help people.

______________

What are some good objects to place in this time capsule to remind people of 2021?

 

[Starlight]

A model of the Titanic, a program from Woodstock and a medical journal that proved the pandemic was finally over...

What is the best time of day?

 

[NearAutomas]

Why, Its obviously; Dorawillgetawaywithcoldmurder day, of course! It only happens everyday during 3:00 AM under certain 'trust me no cap' spiritual conditions, I found a list on the internet that you could follow:

1. Awaken body during hour of summoning.
2. Attach grabbing hand to a candle and light it up.
3. Draw a PERFECT circle. If it is not perfect this will not work and Boots will get you instead.
4. Finally, with a deep sigh of regret, utter the phrase "The weird man licked your mother's sandwich" 3 times.

At exactly 3:666 AM you will be visited by the ghost of Peppa pig.

*What subject(s) would you teach children if you became a teacher?

 

[ReKoil]

Life Lessons....
... my excuse to bully them to no end 😈

Why do you have a broomstick with you?

 

[StCooler]

Is it the first time you see me with my broom? It's my main means of transportation. I only have the broomstick today because I need to go to the mechanic to change the brush.

What happened to the last Pokémon you saw? I don't have any news!😨

 

[NearAutomas]

According to our records and from a few witnesses; it was last seen taking a rare candy before proceeding to enter this white vehicular device. A sketch of the scene was made by a passer by who happens to coincidentally be Leonardo DiCaprio:

Spoiler:

Rough translation by the trainer: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

Wondering how molases is made, any idea?

 

[ReKoil]

You just poor milk down a mole heap and wait for the moles to haul their ases .

How would you solve world hunger?

 

[Starlight]

Very easily. I just need to collect all the infinity stones then I'll get right on it.

How much is a can of soup in your local shop?

 

[Megan]

There's no soup in my local shop. You gotta go on the internet and pay the hefty prices scalpers demand alongside with toilet paper. How much is that? Idk, I don't eat soup.

Is that star moving?

 

[ReKoil]

Nah, you're just imagining it. And you should keep imagining it and not tell anybody for the next 3 days it will take us to get into position... I mean... the three days it takes for your fever to break!

Spoiler:

Have you seen the Pumpkin King lately?

 

[StCooler]

You mean it was a King?! Damn, I ate him :(

Why can't I see unicorns?

 

[Roni]

Because you've been in a coma since July 4, 2009. Please wake up Cooler, we all miss you so much.

What's your favorite app on your phone?

 

[ReKoil]

The Electric Shaver app. I no longer need a shaver as my phone now shaves my beard for me! =D

What's inside that backpack your lugging around? Such a peculiar odor...

 

[Devalue]

Leftovers. Proves so vital in Pokemon. Made perfect sense to eat half of an apple and store the rest forever. Carries it everywhere. Always stays fresh like in Pokemon too.

Helps a ton these days too. Falls ill a lot. Would be in bad shape without its constant heal. Appreciates every hitpoint.

Who would win in a race: the tortoise or the hare?

 

[Roni]

I don't believe either have licenses, so they would be stopped and arrested if they tried.

What was the last thing you drank?

 

[Starlight]

The Aral Sea. Hey I was thirsty okay?

Can you breakdance?

 

[Piedrozan]

No I can't haha

Do you have a dog?

 

[ReKoil]

What can I say, my cat needed a blanket. So I bought a dog.

Spoiler:

What have you been working on in that garage of yours that requires making such a racket?

 

[StCooler]

I was repairing my broom, because the mechanic couldn't. He doesn't know about that technology yet.

Where were you between 5 pm and 6 pm yesterday and do you have any witnesses?